Ok so it's a personal post. Sue me.
So here I am as of last night, all set and ready to quite literally Go Galt like some of our friends have already done. I got nothing to lose here. Yes, I'm a pessimist. Well you know what sometimes happens? Sometimes shit changes out of nowhere.
I'm a panicker. Well, not usually full blown panic attacks like it used to be - I think I used up a lifetime's supply of adrenaline during the great panic of, what, 2002? (24 hour panic attack - completely unsustainable.) One thing about being a worrier, you like to spread it around. Why aren't these people around me scared? Must remedy that immediately. They shouldn't be content when I'm freaking out. How can he SLEEP? Is he insane? He should be kept awake worrying.
Anyway, so I was gonna unpledge and tip the fuck out the back door. Alone or with company, didn't much matter. I had a higher purpose, though, so it's ok. Then suddenly, today I find myself confronted with possibility. And...it came at the last minute. I haven't been confronted with possibility for a long fucking time. Hope is a very hard thing for me, and suddenly this ray breaks through against all odds. You may tell me there's no God, but...damn. Yeah, there really is. Providence is alive and living. Sure I'll find plenty to worry about, always have, but...there's this ray. And we'll see, won't we?
Guess my final stand may take place right here after all. How can a final stand take place in Jersey?